Bennett is 6 Months!

Stats:  At his 6 month check up, he weighed in at 17 lbs 9 oz (49%), was 25 1/4" long (24%) and his head was 17.72" (81%)!  He did some growing last month!

Health:  We still struggle with reflux.  Sometimes he doesn't spit up all day, and sometimes he's just a fountain!  We discussed increasing his med dose at his appointment, but he hates the taste and spits it right back out, so we'll see how that goes...  His cradle cap is gone though, and otherwise, he's a healthy boy!

Sleep:  Sleepless nights continue.  He's usually, predictably up 3 times a night - at 11pm, 1am, 4am, and up for good at 6am.  It's pretty awful.  Our pediatrician says he doesn't need to eat at night anymore, and that he might be waking because of his reflux, and will only go back down after eating because the milk soothes his esophagus.  So we're going to try to get his reflux under control (or at least be confident he isn't waking due to heartburn) and then try some sleep training this next month.

Clothes/Diaper Size:  Bennett is in size 3 diapers and 6 month clothes!  Even though it broke my heart, I had to pack up all of the adorable 3-6 month stuff because I just can't squeeze him in to his little outfits anymore.  I'm going to have to just tape up the boxes and never look at the clothes again because I swear, I will cry if I come face to face with some of those little pajamas that he'll never wear again.

Diet:  We have started introducing some solids!  He's not GREAT with spoon feeding, and I hate getting the mess all over my hands and arms, so I've been giving him REALLY mushy carrot and avocado and so far he's enjoyed smooshing it around on his tray and making a big ol' mess!

Baby Gear Love:  Luckily, baby Bennett likes being in the Ergo, just as Callie did, though he doesn't fall asleep nearly as quickly in it.  But we've found the Ergo to be an awesome piece of travel gear, and I always make sure I have a carrier or some sort when we're going to be out of the house for extended periods.  He will only tolerate being in his carseat stroller for limited amounts of time, so when he starts getting fussy, in to the carrier he goes!
He also loves his command center, as Callie did, and we recently brought down the gargantual Jumparoo that Annie and Aaron handed down to us.  He LOVES jumping around in that thing!

Nicknames:  Not many nicknames for this little guy.  We still mostly call him baby Bennett.

Favorite Songs/Lullabies:  He seems to love whatever I sing to him, and at night it usually tends to be Sweet Chariot.

Milestones/Firsts:  

• First Easter!  We went to Cook Park as a family and met the Easter Bunny and Callie did the Egg hunt while Bryann and Bennett hung out and cheered her on from the sidelines!
• We've seen SOOO many smiles this month!  Bennett is just such a happy baby!  He loves pretty much everyone and is so excited to see me when I pick him up!
• Bennett got much more sturdy this month and I think it's safe to say he's officially sitting up on his own!  He still falls over after awhile, but I can leave him on the grass outside sitting and he'll stay up for quite awhile without me behind him!
• Bennett is finding all kinds of new sounds to make this month.  He does this weird grunting thing now where he sounds a bit possessed.  Our pediatrician said at his 6 mo appointment that his language is really great!  
• Bennett spent his first weekend alone with just Daddy while I got away for the weekend to the beach with girlfriends.  Bryann is amazing.  It seems like this should be a normal (non-amazing) thing, but apparently it's pretty impressive in our society still when you can leave your husband with the kids and not have to plan the weekend for him or leave him instructions on how to care for the children. 
• Bennett has also started dropping things on purpose (the little stinker!)

Likes:

• Mommy! Daddy!  Johnny! Denise! Sister! Basically being held by anyone and getting attention from anyone. :-)
• Bathtime
• Being fed when he's hungry (hahah he just makes the cutest noises when he's hungry and I lay him down in my lap and he knows he's about to be fed.)
• His Jumparoo and his Command Center
• 
  

Dislikes:  

• NOT being held or not being paid attention
• Being in his car seat for too long
• Being hungry and sleepy
• being wet and changed in to clothes after a bath

Things I Don't Want to Forget:

• Bennett does the CUTEST little squirm happy dance whenever I walk around to his car door to open the door and get him.  He's SO happy! 
• Callie "comforting" Bennett when he's upset.  She must have picked it up from me when Bennett was a baby, but she says "Shhh sister's here.  Sister's got you!"
• Callie loves it when I bring Bennett in to wake her up.  Most mornings he'll wake up before she does, so I'll feed him and get him dressed, and then bring him to Callie's room to get her up.  She loves cuddling him in the mornings and if I wake her up without bringing him, she insists I go get him.  She loves her brother so much!
• Bennett sat in the grass for the fist time this month and he did NOT like it!  He got the most adorable upset face like he couldn't decide what this new sensation was on his hands/legs/feet when I set him down.  It was amazing.
• I love watching Bennett jump around in the Jumparoo.  He's got the BEST happy squeals.
• Bryann got sick this past month, and he's just been an amazing partner and father in spite of being sick and traveling all the time.  He got super sick a few weeks ago and had to drive to Tacoma early for a day trip, and he STILL got up with Bennett and helped me out during the night.  

Bennett is 5 Months!

Stats:  We had to bring Bennett in for a doctor visit in early April and he weighed in at 14lbs 13 oz.

Health:  This has been a difficult health month.  Bennett caught a cold, which may have actually been RSV, which turned in to Bronchiolitis.  His breathing was very course and wet and raspy and slightly labored, and he was running a fever of 103.  We gave him Tylenol the evening he was running a fever and he was able to sleep a little better, and then took him in to the doctor.  His breathing wasn't so labored that he needed any interventions, but it was a rough few days, poor baby.  His cold has persisted and he did start having a productive cough after a time.  Currently he's still coughing and has a runny nose, but miraculously, he's stayed a happy little baby this whole time!

Sleep:  Ugggggghhhhh......  This month has been horrible.  He's up 4-5 times a night....  I don't want to talk about it...  He's sick so we don't want to sleep train him.  Plus he's a little too young still.  We did take the swaddle off because we figured his sleep couldn't get any worse so we may as well get the swaddle issue over and done with, so that's one good thing that has come out of the sick/sleep regression.

Clothes/Diaper Size:  Bennett has been wearing 3-6 and 6 mo clothes, and size 2 diapers this month.

Diet:  We got the go-ahead to start solids with him after his 4 mo well-child visit.  So every once in awhile, we put him in the bumbo and see if he's interested in spoon feeding.  So far all he wants to do is grab the spoon and chew on it though!  If I do manage to get food in his mouth, he tongues it out.  So... he's not ready for solids just yet!  He still mostly gets formula, though I did break out the breastmilk stash when he got sick on the off chance that it helped.

Baby Gear Love:  We also transitioned Bennett out of his Rock n' Play this month, but up until now that bed has been amazing!  I love the Solly and keep it in the diaper bag.  It folds up so nicely and easy to transport anywhere!  We have also switched mostly over to MAM bottles, which he does really nicely with.

Milestones/Firsts:

• Wine & Dine at Annie and Aaron's house
• First overnight trip away from mommy and daddy!  We went down to Sacramento to piggyback off of one of Bryann's work trips.  Cherie came and picked up the kids and they stayed with her in Jamestown while Bryann and I stayed in Sacramento for a few days.  I missed the kiddos but I sure did appreciate catching up on sleep for a few nights!
• Bennett rolled over from tummy to back a few times this month!  Although, it was like he learned how to do it, and then lost interest in it and resumed just screaming when he's on tummy time instead of rolling himself back over!
• Bennett was sick for the first time :-( 
• We're also getting so many smiles and squeals out of him.  He's developing such a fun, happy personality!

Likes:  Being held, interacting with people, bath time, his sister

Dislikes:  Not being held, being alone.  That's pretty much it!

Things I Don't Want to Forget:

• Bennett hums while he's settling in to sleep.  It's like he's trying to talk to me still, but he is just so sleepy!!  It's the cutest sound in the world!
• If both kids are still asleep by the time I'm ready for work, I wake Bennett up first and then I bring him in to wake up Callie.  She loves him so much!  If she doesn't want to wake up, she'll be crabby and cranky at me.  But if I bring in Bennett, she'll either cuddle him in her bed for a few minutes (gently) or she'll sit up and want to hold him and coo and him and love on him.  
• Bryann has been traveling a lot for the last year or so for work.  It's been really difficult to be at home alone with the kids so frequently, and it's especially difficult being the only one on night duty when Bennett wakes up 4-5 times and I don't get more than an hour of sleep at a time.  But Bryann makes up for it when he is home.  He takes night duty more often, he lets me sleep in on weekends, and he really just tries to give me whatever breaks I need.

Bennett is 4 Months!

Stats:  He weighed in at 14 lbs 1 oz (he gained a full pound in a month!), 25 inches long, and a head size of 16.63 inches!  My baby app growth chart has him at CDC 49th, 71st, and 63rd respective.  WHO has 24th, 47th, and 72nd respectively.

I recently looked up why clinicians use WHO standards through age 2 and CDC standards after age 2 - here's what the internet has to say:

Clinicians often use the CDC growth charts as standards on how young children should grow. However the CDC growth charts are references; they identify how typical children in the US did grow during a specific time period. Typical growth patterns may not be ideal growth patterns. The WHO growth charts are standards; they identify how children should grow when provided optimal conditions.

Health:  Bennett's eye gunk disappeared after about a week of erythromycin use.  He still has cradle cap, and some dry skin patches so our ped wants us to try soy formula for awhile, just in case he has a milk allergy.  He still has reflux which we try to manage with the Zantac, but it really depends on the day.

Sleep:  Ditto Month 2.  He's pretty predictable.  He's still in our room it the rock n play at night, and we've been putting him in that more frequently during nap time (rather than in the swing) and he's been doing well.

Clothes/Diaper Size:  We are transitioning out of 3 month clothes and in to 6 month clothes.  It really depends on the brand though.  Mostly the 3 month pajamas are too short for him - some of them I have literally had to squeeze him in, and pick him up to stretch out the length!  I'm trying to get one last day in some of my favorites, so it's not suddenly too small and I'm crying because he's growing too fast.

Diet:  Bennett is still bottle fed (probably don't have to continue saying that, since I'll never get a sudden influx of breastmilk! haha) and on formula.  We are on a couple different kinds at this point.  We use Gentlease for his gas, Reguline to get him pooping, and now we're going to try Soy to see if he has a milk allergy.

Our pediatrician gave us the ok to start attempting solid foods with him.  He's sitting supported comfortably in the bumbo for short periods of time (which is what we did with Callie as well) so we'll see if he makes any effort to eat from a spoon.  We're not in a rush.  I don't think Callie ate from a spoon until 6 months or so.  Mainly I think we might just start putting rice cereal in his bottles to see if that helps with his reflux.

Baby Gear Love:  We have enjoyed having Bennett at the dining table with us in his bumbo!  He gets pretty fussy when we leave him on the ground on his play mat and he can't see us.  He also still loves his swing and can sit and just chill in that thing for a good hour or so.  He sleeps well in his rock n play, and he's done well out and about in the Ergo!

Nicknames:  Nothing really new here.  Baby Bennett, Bubs, and Benny Bear may be the winners for a while.

Favorite Songs/Lullabies:  I still sing "Swing Low, Sweet Chariot" for bedtime, along with a smattering of other common lullabies

Milestones/Firsts:  

• He LEGIT laughed this month.  I got a REALLY good giggle session out of him with bicycle legs AND John caught it on video!  
• Bennett has also rolled over from back to front, though not consistently or with any sort of predictability.  And I'm pretty sure he's only rolled on soft surfaces, like the couch ottoman, and not on the floor.  BUT he did roll over, so it counts as a first!  
• He got his bottom two front teeth!  They are supposed to come in between 6-10 months, but he got them a few weeks ago.  Crazy!  And I just KNEW he was teething, too, even though it seemed WAY too early!  Mama knows best.
• We went to the beach for the first time this past month.  We went dow to Salishan for a board game retreat for Bryann.  Vince and Monika came to keep me company and hang out, and it was a miserable rainy weekend, but we made it down to the beach for about 15 minutes and saw harbor seals (!!!) before it started pelting us with hail and we had to go back to the house.  

Likes:  He LOVES his mama and dada and sister.  We all get big smiles when he sees us and we play with him.  He likes being at the table for dinner with us.  He loves his swing and his pacifier, and he still likes being swaddled for naps and bedtime.

Dislikes:  He seriously dislikes being tired, or being gassy.  Or being left alone where he can't see us.  But that's about it!

Things I Don't Want to Forget:  The things I have memories around this month are more to do with Callie.  She really likes a few songs lately - "This Is My Fight Song" and "I Can Make Your Hands Clap" so one night we are listening to music and she puts on one of Bennett's swaddle blankets to wear as a cape and starts doing laps around the kitchen island and asks me to chase her.  So I put a "cape" on too, and chance her around the island.  Then Bryann joins in and grabs a cape and is chasing us all.  And we're all laughing nearly hysterically, running around the island chasing each other.  <3

Bennett is 3 Months!

Stats:  Bennett is 13 lbs 1 oz, which puts him at 42nd percentile for CDC.  Bryann brought him in for a weight check at 3 months, so we got a weight at the clinic rather than using our home scale and saying "give or take a pound!"

Health:  Poor baby boy has had a cold basically all month.  He's been fairly congested and coughs at times, but thankfully it's not been keeping him from being able to eat adequately or sleep.  His right eye is still gunky and teary, so our pediatrician gave us some erythromycin ointment, just in case it was an infection.  He has also only been pooping every few days, so our pediatrician gave us a different formula to try to make him more regular.  But aside from all of that, and the reflux, he's great! hahaha

Sleep:  His sleep has been pretty predictable.  He still usually wakes up around 1 or 2, and then again around 4 or 5.  Every once in awhile he wakes up hungry at 11pm.  Sometimes he's up for good at 6, sometimes he sleep until 7:30.

Clothes/Diaper Size:  We recently started using the size 2 diapers at night and will switch to those during the day when we run out of size 1.  And Bennett fits snugly in 3 mo clothes right now.  And like Callie, he usually lives his days in his pajamas.  They're just so easy to put on and get off and they keep him warm!

Diet:  Though I still have a stash of breast milk from a friend, and from my own supply, I am not giving it to Bennett currently because I can't handle him spitting it all back up.  We currently use Enfamil Gentlease formula, and we'll try out the Enfamil Reguline mix as well.  We tried the Similac Sensitive, but both Bryann and I felt like he was more gassy on that brand.

Baby Gear Love:  The swing is the only place Bennett naps currently.  He started going to daycare with Denise just before his 3 mo birthday, and it's the only place she can get him to nap, too!
I have the Solly in the diaper bag and I love how thin it is and how easy it is to fold up and carry around; we don't bring the Ergo everywhere with us anymore.

Nicknames:  Benny Bear and Baby Bennett are pretty much all we call him.  Sometimes Baby Brother when putting him in the context of a sibling.

Favorite Songs/Lullabies:  Lately I've been singing "Swing Low, Sweet Chariot" to him at bed.  That song seems to zonk him right out!

Milestones/Firsts:  I heard his first laugh when Elizabeth was over for dinner this month!  But we haven't been able to get him to replicate it.  Mostly he squeals and smiles and coos at us.  Bennett can support his head now when being carried or in a sitting position.  He's been doing a lot better on his tummy, even though he's not very happy about it.  He can pick his head up and move it from side to side, and get up on his elbows a little bit.  He even rolled over once! Again, can't get him to reproduce it!  Bennett started going to daycare at Denise's this month while I went back to work, and he's done really well there.  When I've picked up him back up, he hasn't screamed or cried or seemed to miss me or notice that I was gone at all!
This month, Bennett got to spend time with his Aunt Whitley for a long weekend, and hosted his first Superbowl party!

Likes:  Bennett likes to be carried around so that he can see everything around him.  I've started singing the "Walking Around, Looking at Stuff" song that I used to use with Callie!  He also likes swing time, sitting time, buzzy chair time, and he seems to really enjoy bath time!

Dislikes:  Tummy Time!

Things I Don't Want to Forget:  Callie is obsessed with Bennett.  She absolutely loves to hold and play with her baby brother.  She'll make faces at him and then tell me to tell Bennett "Sister is making faces at you! Sister is so silly!!"  I love watching them play together.  Lately he has started noticing her more and definitely smiles back at her and squeals with delight when she plays with him.

Feeding time!

Baby giggles

Bennett is 2 Months!

And in true form, as with Callie, the 2nd month was soooooooooooo much easier than the first month.  Going places got easier, feeding got easier, even sleep got easier (but first got harder)!

Stats:  Healthy boy!  He weighed in at 11 lbs 7 oz (44th%), is 23.5" long (67th%) and his head is 15.8" around (52nd%).  Percentiles according to CDC.  The WHO percentiles calculate a little differently to 27%, 70%, and 78% respectively.  Apparently, worldwide, babies are fatter but shorter and with smaller heads than American babies?  He's been eating perfectly for his weight (recommendation is approximately 2.5 times his weight in fluid ounces) at between 28-30 ounces (benefits of bottle feeding continue...) daily, so even with all the spitting up he's been doing this month, he's still a healthy boy!

Health:  Reflux reared it's ugly head during this month.  I called the clinic the week before christmas, asking for advice because he wasn't sleeping at night, and had started projectile vomiting, and I was on the phone with the clinic nurse explaining what was going on and just started laughing manically from sleep deprivation!  So Bennett is on baby Zantac, just like Callie was.  And it's gotten better.  He still spits up absurd amounts and requires like 5 outfit changes a day,  But at least he's a happy spitter.
And as it turns out, since Bryann neglected to tell me, HE had horrible reflux when he was a baby.  Cherie told me he had to be on soy formula because he would projectile vomit across the room!  Here I was feeling guilty, like my pregnancy heartburn had something to do with my children's reflux, and it was Bryann's fault all along!  (Now everybody chant:  "Bryann's fault! Bryann's fault!")

Sleep:  The beginning of the 2nd month was rough.  As I said, he wasn't sleeping well.  He would sleep for a little while, and then spit up and be awake and pissed (presumably because he was spitting up and I'm sure his esophagus hurt!)  So we'd feed him some more and rock him and soothe him and try to put him back down.  But the second he was on his back again he'd wake up pissed.  We tried a small wedge to lift him up a bit but that didn't help much.
After we saw the pediatrician about the reflux, she said they didn't want him sleeping on his back from the risk of asphyxiation, so we bought a rock 'n play (rocking bassinet thing) that he know sleeps in.  Bryann called it the "miracle bed" after the first night using it.  And since elevating him at night, he sleeps pretty well - eats around 2am, 5am, and up at 7am.
Just recently we've been able to establish somewhat of a routine bedtime and he goes to sleep around 8pm.  When both of us are home, one of us puts Callie down and one of us puts Bennett down.  Bryann has had both kids at night before though, and he wraps up Bennett in the swaddle and pacifies him, then brings him in Callie's room and does her bedtime routine, then puts Bennett down.
So far for naps, he is still in the swing in the living room.  Lately I've been able to turn off the swing and he'll keep sleeping.  I can't remember when Callie started napping well in her crib, but I look forward to that day!

Clothes/Diaper Size:  He is filling out 0-3 mo and 3mo clothes really nicely, and wearing size 1 diapers.

Diet:  I started the month still pumping 3-4 times a day and was only pumping like 6-8 oz a day, and continually getting engorged (what?!  seriously?!) and, in addition to a milk blister that would NOT go away on my left breast, I had been experiencing severe, shooting pains in my breasts.  Almost debilitating.  When I felt them, I would instinctively reach up and grab my boob (which Bryann found embarrassing when we were in public).  I decided, with Bryann behind me questioning why I was putting myself through this misery to produce less than a third of what he was eating, to stop pumping.  It took about 3 weeks, but by Christmas I was pump free.  I'm not sure I was even sad to see the end of that relationship.  It's hard to have a relationship with a pump.  I remember being sad to have stopped pumping for Callie, but I wasn't so miserable and in so much pain while pumping for her either.
When I was really done providing breast milk for Bennett, I felt simultaneously relieved that I was done and guilty for feeling relieved.  But I am free and the agony of both the pumping and of making that hard decision is over.  And today, I feel completely fine.  I did what I could for him, and sooooo many things about it just weren't working.  And I think we're both happier for it now.
Since he started spitting up so much early this month, I stopped feeding him my pumped breast milk.  He spit up my breast milk one time and I actually cried about it.  Lately I've been using some of the breast milk donated by a friend and he's been doing really well with it.
We also switched him over to the gentle/sensitive formula to try to address his gassiness (and also maybe affect the spit-up) and we've seen a pretty drastic improvement on his gas.  Hopefully he outgrows it and we don't have to buy that stuff forever because OHMYGOD IS IT EXPENSIVE, and OHMYGOD HIS POOP STINKS!!
Speaking of poop, he has been an every other day pooper lately.  I think we have another slow-colon kid which means I'm already on high alert for constipation issues later on.

Baby Gear Love:  The rock n' play has legitimately been miracle bed for us lately.  Who knows when we'll be able to lay him down flat (read:transfer him to his crib), but in the meanwhile, that thing is a god send
Still daily using and loving the swing!
Ergo
Solly wrap - I like this way better than the Moby.  They're tied the same way, but the Solly is way thinner and stretchier, so it's really easy to pack.  It stays in the diaper bag and I use it whenever we're out.
Speaking of diaper bags, my parents bought be a monster sized diaper bag that I'm currently in love with because it holds ALL OF THE THINGS!  We go to the gym several times a week and bring both kids and it is amazing.

Nicknames:  Mister, Benny-Bear, Baby Bennett

Favorite Songs/Lullabies:  I've been singing "Sweet Chariot" and "Blackbird" at bedtimes lately.  And then, in keeping with my personality, I sing whatever random song with random words come in to my head - classics such as "Do You Know How Much I Love You?", "Yummy Yummy Yummy, Milk in my Tummy", and "This is the Poop that Never Ends"

Milestones/Firsts:  First Christmas and first road trip down to Klamath Falls.  Then second Christmas here at the house where he met Grandma Cherie and Great Grandpa "Papa" Joe (his namesake for his middle name).  We celebrated our first New Year's Eve party at Nate and Kimber's, and he went to the zoo for Zoo Lights for the first time,
We started to see smiles this month too!  And seeing him smile and interact with me lowers my anxiety about developmental issues that wouldn't have been tested for or noticed in utero.  He "goos" for us and makes all kinds of other fun sounds.  He really responds to people and loves to interact and "chat" with us.
His head and neck are getting stronger, too.  He can essentially hold his head up when I'm holding him upright against my body and walking around the house.  And when he's on the play mat, he's almost flipped himself over a few times.

Likes:  Mama!  Being fed.  His swing.  Being talked to.  Being held facing outward so he can look at stuff.  He likes to walk around the house and look at all of the things.

Dislikes:  Car rides.  I am anxious about taking him anywhere because I never know whether he's going to be chill in the car, or whether he's going to scream the entire time.  Also dislikes the usual stuff like being hungry, being tired, having clothes pulled over his head.

Things I Don't Want to Forget:  Callie has taken to pretending she's a little baby, and she'll often spend good chunks of time on the floor, on the play mat with Bennett.  He loves to look at her, and she loves to be around him and asks him to say "Goo".  She makes silly faces at him and he smiles and smiles and smiles!  I hope they grow up to be friends.  They are farther apart in age than I wanted, but I think their relationship already is pretty special.

Hanging out with Theo and Ophelia at New Year's

Bennett is 1 month!

After 3 years, I almost forgot how trying the first month of newbornhood can be!  Bennett really threw us for some loops there during his first few weeks.  But like with Callie, I feel like I have him figured out at this point.  We've had a few weeks to get to know each other, and I feel like I have my feet under me again.  

Like with Callie's blog posts, I will update monthly for Bennett's first year.  I've been assured that if I don't update, I will receive prodding from my adoring fans (read: my mother).  And I wouldn't want Bennett to feel like the 2nd, neglected child, after all!

Being silly with big sister

1-month old!

Stats: Bennett was born @ 8 lbs 5 oz, 21" tall.  He spent several days tricking me into thinking he was breastfeeding well, but not actually eating anything at all.  Apparently I was just a giant pacifier to him.  By day 4, at our first Lactation visit, he had lost 9% of his body weight and was down to 7lb 6 oz.  We made some adjustments to his feeding (see Diet) and he started to gain his weight back nicely.  According to our home scale, he currently weighs about 10lbs!  We won't have another official stats check until his 2-month visit.

Health:  Bennett has the same plugged tear duct in his left eye that Callie did, but a warm washcloth usually takes care of the gunk.  He's also a gassy little baby, and we're pretty sure all of the sleep issues we have (see Sleep) are due to his tummy troubles.  We're trying all of the things - gentle formula, breastmilk with dietary changes, bicycle legs, upright feedings, burping frequently, simethicone drops, but he still has non-stop rumblies in his tumbly!

Sleep:  When we first brought Bennett home, he would give us pretty long stretches at night.  Around 4-5 hrs for the first stretch, and then about 3 hrs after that.  Then he started to wake up, and get all gassy, and doesn't sleep as well.  We will wake up to him grunting and farting, just waiting until he decides he's awake and hungry, or just needs to fart.  Most of the time he's down for the night between 8-9 and will sleep until 1am or so.  But sometimes (like last night) he's up at 1045, then 2am, then 330, then 5, then 7, and we go a bit insane.  Hopefully, once his gut develops fully and figures itself out, we can all get a good night's sleep.

Clothes/Diaper Size:  Currently in size 1 diapers, and either newborn or 0-3 mo clothing.  We have been stretching out the days of newborn clothes.  Some of them are so stinking precious, I don't ever want him to stop wearing them!  But their days are numbered.

Diet:  Ugh.  I could write an entire post about our feeding woes. At our 4-day lactation visit, he had continued to lose weight post-hospital, and when we did the feeding at the visit, we took a weight before and after and he didn't gain anything.  Meaning, he didn't eat anything.  He breastfed for 20 minutes and didn't gain anything.  Our LC was a bit stumped.  His latch looked great, he didn't have a tongue-tie, and my milk had obviously started to come in.  She said he was on the border of panicking as far as his weight loss, and so I was to feed him for 10-minutes on each side, then pump for 10 minutes and give him the pumped milk, and then to supplement with a bottle of formula until he wasn't screaming in hunger anymore.

Feeding him worked wonders.  It turns out a fed baby is a happy baby.  But continuing to breastfeed him didn't improve his intake.  At our follow-up visit 2 days, and 4 days afterward, he still didn't have any weight changes after a feeding.  The LC offered that boys are notoriously lazy eaters, and to pair that with a boy who'd been a week late and had that much extra time spoiled with an all-you-can-eat umbilical cord buffet, made Bennett even lazier.

Feeding him, then pumping, then bottle feeding him just wasn't a sustainable option for us.  And when I breastfed him, he was just fussy and popped on and off constantly, and was a pretty miserable experience for both of us (not to mention the nipple pain from his tight newborn latch) so I decided to just pump and to bottle feed him pumped milk and formula.

My supply also never fully revved up.  I was pumping 8 times a day, over 2 hours a day, and I was taking 21 supplements a day for over a week and didn't notice an increase at all, which was making me crazy.  So I decided to wean down to something manageable for me.  I'm currently pumping 3-4 sessions a day, depending on engorgement, and not going insane.

I did try breastfeeding again recently.  Bennett will still latch, and pretend to feed for a little while, and he's calm during the session (probably because he's well fed otherwise).  But then I was skipping pumping sessions because I assumed he was eating this time (which he wasn't), only to be engorged and plugged up a few hours later since I'd essentially missed a feeding.  I'm not sure I want to keep trying to breastfeed him.  I do miss the relationship/comfort/bonding, but it also feels pointless if he's not eating, so I'm less motivated to try.

And I'm finding I can bond with him during bottle feeding sessions, now that he's looking at me.  I'm talking to him more and singing more.  And we can still do skin to skin.  I have daily bouts of feeling devastation at the loss of the relationship, only to turn around and feel relief that I'm not his only source of food, and I can sleep longer stretches at night while Bryann bottle feeds.  I'm comforted slightly that at least one of his feedings is breastmilk, and I've frozen a few bags so that I can extend the amount of time he gets breastmilk.  It's not that I think formula is bad or dangerous for him.  It's mostly the relationship I'm grieving over losing.  But I see that he's gaining weight, and developing as he should, and I think as time passes, and I see how he's growing no differently than Callie did, or any other breastfed baby, I will ease up on myself a little bit.

Baby Gear Love:  The Ergo.  Forevermore my favorite and most used baby item.  We are also a bottle-loving family at this point and I have personally found a microwave bottle sterilizer indispensable.  Among other frequently used items - Costco formula, baby swing, and velcro swaddlers.  

Nicknames:  We just call him Bennett pretty frequetly.  But Benny-Bear came out a few times and I couldn't stop myself.  It has begun.  And it's my own fault.  I was the first one to break.  Otherwse, Baby Bennett is probably what Callie will call him for the foreseable future.

Favorite Songs/Lullabies:  I haven't started singing him to sleep, so when I sing to him, it's mostly made-up songs about how much I love him, or how hungry he is, or how gassy he is.

Milestones/Firsts:  He seems to have pretty good head strength.  He picks up his head when we're burping him and trys to fling it off of his body.  He also has been able to move his head from side to side during tummy time!  He's more alert now and will look us in the eyes when we're feeding him, and he is starting to track when we move.  He also responds and turns his head towards sounds.

Likes:  Being held, being in the Ergo, bouncing, being fed.

Dislikes:  Not being held, not being fed immediately, and having his clothes changed.

Things I Don't Want to Forget:  He yawns just like Callie used to when she was an infant.  He brings his hands up to his little head and leans back and makes the cutest squinchy face in the world.  I'd almost forgotten Callie's yawn, until he was born and started doing it, and all of my memories came flooding back.

The way he nestles his little arms under him and leans his head on my chest and falls asleep after a feed and a good burp.

His little squeaks and sounds when he sleeps.  Maybe I'll have the attention span to get a recording/video soon.

Bryann asked him during a feeding one time "Do you want more to eat?" and the way Bennett sighed/squealed in response sounded exactly like "Mmm-Hmm!"

Week #39

Apparently 10 weeks goes by fast when you're at the end of your pregnancy!  I have generally been feeling so worn out between work, and taking care of Callie in the evenings, and juggling household maintenance that the last thing I want to do is get on my computer and blog.  (Good thing I don't do this for a living!)  But I still want to offer #2 insight into the pregnancy, should he be interested someday, so I'm trying to squeeze some updates in during these final days!

We decided some time ago to name baby boy "Bennett", but I suppose it can be blog official now.  I'm not sure how we came up with it.  I saw or heard it somewhere, and played around with it (and possibly researched origins and meaning and popularity, as I am known to do).  We started calling him Bennett to test it out, and I suppose it stuck when we told Callie that his name was Bennett.  (She only ever calls him Baby Bennett, by the way.  Totally adorbs.)  It was a little late to turn back once she started pointing out my "big big belly" to everyone that passed by and letting them know that that's her brother, Baby Bennett.

Bennett is a derivitive of the latin Benedictus (as are all Ben-rooted names) which means "Blessed".  For babies, it can be interpreted as "blessed little one", but I prefer to interpret it to mean that we all are blessed with this little life who made his way to us and decided to stick around.

While Bennett has traditionally been a last name, originating mostly from England and Normady, it is gaining popularity as a first name, and Bryann and I both think it's fun as a kids name, and is sophisticated as a man's name.  It's still not in the top 100 as far as boys names go, which was one of our preferences, but it's sharply on the rise, so who knows.  Perhaps the world will be flooded with Bennetts in a few years, and our teen son will use it in his arsenal of reasons to be mad at us for ruining his life.  :-P

In other news, the nursery is ready, aside from a couple of boxes of goodwill donations and bags of wrapping paper, tags, hangers, and other unwrapping garbage that just needs to be taken out!  I have been meaning to get it cleaned up so I can take photos of the room before it's occupied....  Add that to our to-do list over the next few days.  Aside from that, we have everything we need.  Pack'n'play is set up in our bedroom, next to the bed.  Diaper bag is packed for the hospital.  Infant car seat is in the car and ready to go.  I am SO far ahead of the game the 2nd time around, I should get an award!  I had some serious nesting syndrome with this pregnancy, and hardly felt the need to nest at all with Callie.  Who knows if that has any links to Bennett's personality, but time will tell.

Callie is getting excited to meet her baby brother.  The other day she let us know that it was her job to get baby Bennett out of his crib... we had to have a discussion about what jobs Callie is well suited for - playing with baby, giving hugs and kisses, tickling baby, helping us get diapers, reading to baby - and what jobs were for mommy and daddy only - picking up baby, feeding baby, changing baby's diaper.  C has been around enough infants that I think she has an idea of what we're all in for, but we'll see whether expectations meet reality when she's faced with her attention-stealing baby brother.  But she's so kind and gentle with our friends babies, that I'm confident she'll adjust well.

What Baby T has been up to:

• Bennett is the size of a mini-watermelon right now.  We went to the pumpkin patch last weekend and Bryann wanted to do a pic comparing a pumpkin to my belly, but I conveniently forgot to do it.  heehee
• He was considered full term after 37 weeks, and has really just been putting on the pounds over the last few weeks.  His lungs are now fully developed and he's been practicing breathing (my OB even saw it!) and has been hiccuping a few times a day.  
• He also likes to practice stretching and kicking and trying to tumble around like the good ol' days, but he's run out of room and so just ends up kneeing me in the ribs instead.  

Pregnancy symptoms include:

• Ugh!  These last few weeks really suck.  I have managed to avoid the stretch marks and the swelling, but if it's on the list otherwise, I've got it!  Heartburn, restless leg, itchy abdomen, back pain, round ligament pain, exhaustion and fatigue, constipation and gas, and the list goes on.
• I feel like I have a mini-pharmacy at my bedside.  I take my prenatals at night as well as some pepcid for the heartburn, some benedryl for the restless leg and to help me get to sleep, some TUMS for the heartburn that I currently have, and saline spray for my simultaneously dry and congested nose (what?!)
• The strong desire to not be pregnant anymore.  I remember during my last few weeks with C, I was ok being pregnant awhile longer.  Catch up on rest, sleep a little longer, enjoy the final days before my life completely changed.  But not this time.  I'm ready.  Let's do this.  I am already not sleeping longer than 2 hour stretches from either needing to pee or needing to burp or feeling like I'm going to vomit from the acid reflux.  I'd rather have a reason I'm not sleeping, like feeding a baby, than dealing with this crap any longer!